Picture by Unsplash

Flagging has long been an integral part of gay subculture â€” a way of discreetly and safely saying “
I’m here and I’m queer
“ and never having to out you to ultimately the straights. This tactic was specifically employed in the outdated days (not too old days, it actually was actually merely like 30 years ago) when it was not

as

secure is outwardly queer. While our very own existence is still „othered“ and
persecuted
in countless means, we do have more capability to end up being easily our selves in public areas. Thereby, flagging has kind of dropped for the wayside.

And even though I do not desire to recreate the occasions of queer folks virtually fearing in regards to our life (
though #45 is actually unfortunately taking united states there
), i want to restore style statements which are
exclusively

ours

. Strategies to suggest to fellow queers that we see them therefore we are one of these. Apparel might have an easy method of empowering the wearer — so when mentioned garments is actually making an unabashedly queer statement to everyone, whether or not they accept it or not, it is a form of embodying invincibility against all chances.

Including, you much better gamble the beautiful butt that my personal soft environmentally friendly hanky and my bright red bandana are not only for fashion. Once I put on these kinds of queer expression, i’m more confident, more gorgeous and much more visibly queer. It feels like a type of rebellion from the status quo — typically because when We find the eye of someone which registers back at my flagging, i’m like we now have a secret vocabulary no body more all around us knows.

Flagging has an overtly intimate history — often linked with the occasions of homosexual men driving for casual gender in Central Park or leather-based dykes‘ chilling out at their unique regional watering gap. Susan Stryker and Jim Van Buskirk suggest in “

Gay by Bay: A History of Queer Culture for the san francisco bay area Bay neighborhood
,“

your hanky rule started in NYC during the 70’s when a reporter for your Village Voice composed a joke this might possibly be much more efficient to slightly announce particular intimate expertise with in different ways coloured hankies than sporting secrets to show whether somebody was actually a leading or bottom.

Hanky rule
was the primary method of flagging back then. Getting your hanky throughout the left part of the human body means you’re a high, having it in the right side implies you’re a base and putting on it around the throat stands for flexible. Even though the color or design are what shows your specific desires or fetishes — including, black means you’re into
S&M
, dark blue signifies anal, red-colored is actually for
fisting
and grey suggests you’re into slavery. This coded and also queer vocabulary has been used as a discussion beginner, for a moment. Wearing a dark bluish hanky on your own right side does not mean some body show up for you, draw the trousers right down to start performing anal for you. There are a few standard instructions regarding flagging:

1. Flagging isn’t
permission
.

2. Flagging means being cool with getting propositioned,
getting rejected
, and having the capability to decline.

3. Flagging is actually skillet gender (you can not believe someone’s rubbish from a flag).

4. there are not any anti-flags.

5. Flagging is actually slut pride.


Picture by WordPress

„The handkerchief is however a product observed getting especially essential one of the affluent, upper-class, and generally fancy directly men of times that sought after and courted women with matrimony proposals becoming the greatest aim of the partnership, maybe not complete stranger sex,“
writes blogger Soul Train Kevin
. „Gay men rather turned this snobbish explanation of this handkerchief around and flipped their meaning and use by actually using it as an indication to any and all sorts of comers that careless, virtually anonymous sex ended up being offered to all of them should they match up in choices.“

There is this phrase „homosocialization“ and really, I adore this term really. You queers found some extremely creative strategies to communicate together and never having to down ourselves in very dangerous environments. Locating queer area can be a pivotal moment for folks simply entering their sexuality or
gender identification
or navigating a brand new city/space. There’s something to get said your ways in which getting marginalized delivers people together, on occasion out of requirement and quite often because we need to commiserate with others just who *get it*. Flagging is a method of homosocializing who has provided queer folx the capacity to mention the intercourse without shame — on occasion whenever all of culture has actually observed our sex as a literal crime. While many queers that happen to be additionally immersed in perverted or BDSM communities nevertheless use the hanky signal, it is not as more popular any longer.

Other forms of flagging have since already been absorbed by straights completely, also. Do you ever understand that period every right girl went through five years in the past with painting the woman 4th nail an alternate shade than the rest? Yup, that started out as a queer
rencontre femme enceinte flagging
strategy.
Although straights coopted it thereby managed to make it worthless
.

Very queer babes, you have to restore flagging for everyone to identify and employ more frequently. Here are three ways I’m suggesting we could exercise!



1. Literally begin flagging once again, hanky signal and all.

Come july 1st, I would like to see y’all out with your hanky’s! Tuck them into your high waisted shorts. Wrap all of them around the bikini top. Boldly link them around your neck. Put them on to brunch. Put them on to Cubbyhole. Bring them to the next
queer play party
.

It is necessary that should you see somebody else flagging and would like to get flirt with them, that you know permission is still vital. Ask them regarding their hanky, what it ways to them, if you possibly could seize their particular number, etc. Obtain the picture.

For full hanky signal of colours, roles and designs
just click here
.



2. Reclaim femme nail enamel flagging.

Queer femmes
tend to be pure magic. I enjoy the methods which we can be found in the world — the revolutionary ways that we take up area and create brand new methods to express our femmeness continuously. When individuals tell us that we can not f*ck with the extended fingernails, we inform them usually. When individuals tell us we are also fairly to get queer, we demonstrate to them usually.

Once we’re informed to use up less room in queer areas, we discover methods to make space for the very own nuanced experiences. Like femme nail enamel flagging. It began to be a thing around 2007 whenever queer
femmes on Tumblr
started initially to determine exactly what particular habits, tones and styles displayed intimately.


Picture by Femme Flagging Tumblr


„Moira, sitting from the side of my personal bed, feet entered, ankle on leg, inside her purple overalls, one dangly earring,

the gold finger nail she wore becoming peculiar,

a cigarette smoking between the woman stubby yellow-ended hands,“ writes


Marget Atwood in “
The Handmaid’s Tale
“ that could be considered to be a refined prediction for femme flagging back in 1985.

However, in 2012 well-known magazines like
Jezebel
and
xoJane
started to compose parts about it queer femme training — and thus, right women turned it into „accent fingernails.“

„i am concerned that accent fingernails are too prominent now used in an effort to flag femme and/or queer. Pinterest is filled with accent nail photographs, particularly the ring-finger, and that I have seen lots of straight women wearing accent fingernails today too. Therefore had been such a thing actually ever chosen a definitive shade or nail to at least flag queer?“ had written Tumblr individual invertsugar on 7, 2012.

But we vote that people come across new how to flag with this nail polish. Maybe we make it about maybe not painting certain fingernails to flag different needs. Or we’ve various designs to signal for our kinks — like stripes for bondage and polka dots for fisting or gold glitter on precisely the pinky nail for femme4femme desires. Who would like to create the code with me and disperse throughout the queer internet?!
Struck me personally up
.



3. utilize pins to banner.

Pins tend to be a feminist fashion declaration that features taken the tradition by storm. Although this kind of flagging is a bit more overt than hanky or nail polish code — it could merely work now that we do have the capacity to be more visible. If you are into fisting, it really is quick, just
use this pin
on lapel of the leather-jacket.


Pic by Etsy

Will you be an attractive femme father? Fully grasp this
collar chain
for your self and also you could possibly discover baby you are considering ;). I guess by using the convenience of exposure, we become the ability to be much more out with the help of our needs. And let us end up being genuine, most of the communications on these pins is certainly going appropriate during the minds of unaware directly folx, bless their own hearts.

While flagging may seem like a simple
style statement
to some, it may be a nuanced device for queer interaction and hookup for other people. A child queer in rural America may indeed see an older dyke putting on a red bandana around the woman throat and feel thus affirmed in that moment. It’s vital to know about the annals of homosocializing in addition to get a hold of approaches to carry on it — due to the fact, seriously, f*ck normalcy. I really don’t wish to be regular. I don’t wish queerness becoming normalized. I do want to be queer AF and that I want my fellow queers to understand it also to see me personally.